Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Bleh....I'm overwhelmed again. It's almost to the point of being debilitating. For those of you who don't know, I have Bipolar Disorder II. So, I'm in an upswing and I'm feeling really creative and motivated, but there are so many things I want to do and my mind can't focus enough to complete any of them, so the result is nothing gets done and I'm overwhelmed and I feel guilty.

We are starting the ADD evaluation for Ethan. Things are getting a little out of hand at home and school. The pediatrician originally wanted me to wait until Ethan turned 6, but that's only two months away and by then he will be out of school for the summer. Part of the evaluation is done by the teacher, that's kind of hard to get done if you're out for summer break. I'm not sure what to think about it all. If he is diagnosed with it, that means there is something to blame for all the problems, a name for it. But it also means the possibility of medicating such a young, sweet little body. That scares me. I know how miserable it is to try different meds and deal with the side-affects and put so much hope in them, only to find out a few months later that they don't work, they aren't the "right fit," and you feel like you've wasted so much time. A child so young, that can not choose for himself, should not have to go through that. But, if/when we do find the right med it could mean a much happier, focused, well behaving boy. Life could be a lot better. What a risk to take.

Today the pediatrician told me that if Delilah gets one more bout of wheezing cough within the next couple of months it could indicate that she has asthma. Also, if she gets another round of ear infections she has to have tubs put in her ears. That means surgery! My little baby, just over 4 months. She can't have surgery, she's way too young for my liking to have it. But, I don't want to put her hearing at risk. You know, for a baby that has been sick so much, she is so happy and such a joy. I would've never known she was sick judging by her temperament.

Wow, what a downer. I guess that goes to show I shouldn't read sad blogs before I write my own. I'll try to make up for it by posting a super cute pic.


This is what the kids woke up to on April Fool's Day morning. Aaron had drawn the mustaches on with my eyeliner. Thankfully he didn't think I needed one too.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Have you tried a diet. I have a couple of people in my ward that are dealing with ADD and they are having great results with diets.

melanie said...

There's a great book called potatoes Not Prozac. I've never read it, but have heard great things about it. I know that hot dogs affect ADD. Good luck with everything, Ethan is a great kid!

If Delilah needs tubes, it will help a lot! I had them when I was a kid. When the doctor took them out he told me he was taking out my ear drums. He even showed them to me and I thought for years that I had no ear drums!

princess jen said...

I'm so happy to see a picture of those cute kids of yours!! Have I mentioned lately how much I miss you?! I'm sad to hear you are having such a hard time right now. Good luck with Ethan. Trust your gut--you do know what's best for him. Listen to the experts' recommendations, but you still know what's best. I don't know much about tubes but hearing loss is a scary thing to contemplate. Love you so much!!

Anonymous said...

I love you 2 cousin. I can help with your blog if you need it. I know by going to the website "thecutestblogonetheblock.com" helps. And then you can find beautiful templates.
Delilah if she does have ear tubes you can call me with anything since that is my specialty in the nursing field. And the best thing no IV's at all. I'm so sorry to hear that she my possiably have asthma. Just know that now medically that there are wonderful medications to help.
I'm so sorry about Ethan. ADD is a hard concept to deal with but if medication is needed don't be afraid and listen to the dr. I wish I was close to give you the biggest hug. I will be sending pictures soon. Give the kids a hug and kiss for me.

Miriam said...

That is a funny picture. Good luck with the Add evaluation. Having tubes put in is really not that bad. My kids have really benefited from them. But I understand your concern with both trials. Is is sad to see those little ones in surgery and it is awful to play with medicines, trying to find the right one. Plus multiple side effects and allergic reactions. I love you, I'm sure you will do a wonderful job working your sweet children through these difficult patches.